Clarification about Nigerian girls

30Jan08

A friend of mine commented on my entry about “bad” and good Nigerian girls and she asked a good question: what am I basing my judgment on?

First off, I am using the idea of what makes someone “good” or “bad” somewhat tongue-in-cheek. How convenient that I seem to have the qualities of the good Nigerian girl while qualities that I don’t have get put in the “bad” category!

What I know of the “bad” Nigerian women is exactly what I’ve said. I only see them at social events and what I see is the dressing that seems to lowcut (tops or dresses) and highcut (skirts or dresses) to me, and they generally have on far too much makeup. I hear the loud voices and have made the assumption that the reason for it is the desire to attract attention. I myself am loud when I’m with friends, and perhaps I only notice these loud girls because I don’t usually have a bunch of friends at these events to be loud with.

I don’t really talk to these girls, so I don’t know anything about who they are as people. Perhaps they are quieter when they are not at a party, maybe they don’t view their clothing the same way I view it and they think the way I dress is ultra conservative and boring.

I could learn a number of things from the “bad” girls too: how to be confident, how to have a sense of adventure and relax, and how (to appear) not to care what others think of your actions. In the right doses, these are all great things to learn.

When I said that I tend to gravitate toward quieter women who are smart and elegant, the implication is not that “bad” girls aren’t smart, just that when I see them at a party, their intelligence is not the first thing that comes to mind—I’m usually focused on how they manage to keep their top up without it falling off, or wondering how they can avoid flashing their butts in something so short. I am basing my judgment on their appearance alone, and not on the whole package, something a good girl wouldn’t do.

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2 Responses to “Clarification about Nigerian girls”

  1. while i see you making and effort to say you’re not, you sound pretty judgemental here, and i didnt even read your original post

  2. 2 GoodNaijaGirl

    I agree that my original post could be taken as mean spirited (which was not my intention) and after a friend made a comment to me, I wrote this clarification.

    I re-read this post and I think it’s actually more self-deprecating than judgmental, especially the second paragraph and then near the end. We all form our opinions of people we see based on our first impression: sometimes we share it like I’ve done here, sometimes we don’t. In the above I admit that I’m basing my opinion of “bad” girls on a less than complete picture of who they are.

    I do appreciate your comment and hope my explanation gives an idea of where I’m coming from.



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